jornales

for a moment of joy or moments no one pays for, i give myself a ‘jornal’. this makes me rich. try it.

Need to know why editor passed on these haiku

These haiku belong to a batch of 20 I recently submitted with temerity to what I call a ‘cutting-edge’ haiku journal. None was accepted, of course, although two interested the editor. Why? I can’t figure out on my own. Could you help me think this through? I reworked on three of them (1, 2 & 5) and did not include what got the editor’s eye.

1.
seagulls scanning tide marks
as if tasked

2.
competing with shadows
the winter wind

3.
salmon–
on winter clouds
a hue

4.
stepping into a fog
knowing
white also fades

5.
origami–
in her hands a crane
a smile

Origami crane folded from one uncut square of paper by Andreas Bauer courtesy of wikicommons

January 8, 2011 Posted by | haiku, poetry | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

last ornament (Christmas eve)

last ornament
on the Tree, a crane origami–
Christmas eve

A rewrite from original haiku posted in Margaret Dornaus’ blog, haikudoodle under the topic “trimming the tree”.

December 24, 2010 Posted by | haiku, poetry | , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment