for a moment of joy or moments no one pays for, i give myself a ‘jornal’. this makes me rich. try it.


snow-clad trees

on spring morning

looking for robins

Because a haiku moment is rare for its purity, I give myself $500 as my ‘jornal’ for this. What do you think?

March 12, 2009 - Posted by | poetry, reflection | , , , , ,


  1. What is the title? I like tis poem–it has a nice juxtaposition between winter and spring, warmth and cold..there is alot of unspoken imagery.

    I always struggle with the middle line in Haiku. Any tips??

    🙂 Lynn

    Comment by graceofwynn | March 12, 2009 | Reply

  2. Hi Lynn,

    Thanks for your brief critique on my haiku. You “caught” the moment with precise words just as I did. I believe a haiku does not need a title. It simply is.

    The truth is, I, too, am still learning to write a haiku. Though some have been accepted by LYNX, an online journal, and chosen by PoemShape to show what a haiku is, I’m still struggling to write and be published in Heron’s Nest as well.

    Here then are some tips–not mine–from “Simply Haiku”, another site. Try to access these and read as much haiku as you can. All editors advise just that–read. And keep writing!

    Taken from “Simply Haiku”
    Here are some qualities we find essential to haiku:
    • Present moment magnified (immediacy of emotion)
    • Interpenetrating the source of inspiration (no space between observer and observed)
    • Simple, uncomplicated images
    • Common language
    • Finding the extraordinary in “ordinary” things
    • Implication through objective presentation, not explanation: appeal to intuition, not intellect
    • Human presence is fine if presented as an archetypical, harmonious part of nature (human nature should blend in with the rest of nature rather than dominate the forefront)
    • Humor is fine, if in keeping with “karumi” (lightness) – nothing overly clever, cynical, comic, or raucous
    • Musical sensitivity to language (effective use of rhythm and lyricism)
    • Feeling of a particular place within the cycle of seasons

    Comment by alee9 | March 13, 2009 | Reply

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